The world is very quiet without you around.
My name is Hershlay. I speak the third most Italian.sophomore(s) choking the network from a laptop at Kirkland.
“He just sort of can’t be bothered to return anything. I feel like he’s the boy who has whatever he wants, but like… I do spend money on these things…”
(Source: cyborglovesong)
Sally: You know, you ruin every 4th of July.
Dan: YOU RUIN THE 4TH OF EVERYTHING!
Happy 4th of July, everyone!
Seth Meyers and I are on a similar wavelength.
"These are my birth certificate jokes. So thank you for the timing on that, Mr. President. (They’re) now unusable. We were working on these jokes for months. One of my guys said, ‘Are you worried we’re a little heavy on birth certificate jokes? What if he releases it before the dinner?’ And I was like ‘Why would he do that? He’s not gonna wait three years and release it before the dinner.’ (To the President.) Who told you I had birth certificate jokes? It was Assange, wasn’t it?"
SETH MEYERS, at the White House Correspondents’ Dinner. (Complete with cutaway shot of an unamused Donald fucking Trump.)
(Source: inothernews)
![Jimmy: (to Seth) Have you two ever physically fought? If so, who won?Seth: …I remember when [Josh] grabbed a chair once, chased me to my room—I closed the door—and then he threw the chair at the door and like put a hole in my door—Josh: A very clean hole—Seth: A very clean hole, and our parents were on vacation and then, like, we put a bumper sticker on my door, and I remember my dad being like, “Who do you take me for!”.](http://25.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lkdy5xmP721qhcgoso1_r1_500.png)
Jimmy: (to Seth) Have you two ever physically fought? If so, who won?
Seth: …I remember when [Josh] grabbed a chair once, chased me to my room—I closed the door—and then he threw the chair at the door and like put a hole in my door—
Josh: A very clean hole—
Seth: A very clean hole, and our parents were on vacation and then, like, we put a bumper sticker on my door, and I remember my dad being like, “Who do you take me for!”.
SNL year-end writers party where we broke the table.
- Jimmy Fallon
Seth Meyers: Peter Sarsgaard and Maggie Gyllenhaal were married this past weekend. They wrote their own vowels.
(Source: lizdexia)
#say hi to your brother for me.
(via whatupwithtthat)
ipsa:
(via cyborglovesong)
Because, Martha, you never know where you’ll end up after SNL after-after-afterparties.
(Source: annperkins)
(Source: elizabethsaysrelax)
